Grateful.

For boobs. Yes. I said it. While I was carrying a big stack of personal pan pizza pans to put away, I realized that it would not have been possible for me to do so successfully without being a girl. They're great. Kinda like those little SIDs baby cushion pillow things. 

Like this! But... different. 

I'm also grateful for facebook, so I can mock the status of a certain other.  

What?  You read 13 books over the summer?! 

Big whoop. I've read: 

1. HP
2. HP
3. HP
4. HP
5. HP
6. HP
7. HP
8. CoN
9. CoN
10. CoN
11. CoN
12. CoN
13. CoN
14. CoN
15. Wicked Lovely
16. PJO
17. PJO
18. PJO
19. PJO
20. PJO
21. The Once and Future King (Which technically counts as four books but bound together in one huge amazing book. But whatever.)
22. Kneeknock Rise
23. Arthur (Lame.)
24. Over Sea and Under Stone
25. The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane
26. CoP
27. CoP
28. CoP
29. Wonderful Wizard of Oz
30. Crocodile Gene and his Friends (Yes, it's a chapter book.)
31. The Stray

HP - Harry Potter

CoN - Chronicles of Narnia

PJO - Percy Jackson and the Olympians

CoP - Chronicles of Prydain

In progress: 

1. Forever Amber
2. Pride and Prejudice
3. Pride and Prejudice and Zombies
4. Arthur of Britain
5. Mists of Avalon
6. Henry VI
7. The Canterbury Tales

So, I win. 31 is greater than 13. And is soon to be 38. Idiot. 

Oh the internets.

Stranger: Guten Tag

You: shalom

Stranger: My name is hans hello

You: my name is sofia

Stranger: I am living in Austria, where are you living in?

You: florida for the summer

Stranger: Oh in America?

You: yes sir

Stranger: I hear that Florida state in america has 90% homosexual brothels there

Stranger: Many many homosexuals living in there

You: yes, and many of them are my friends

Stranger: Ahh so does this make you homosexual?

You: No actually It does not.

Stranger: In my country they are inprisoned.

Stranger: Well not anymore, it was soon turned over

You: That is weird.

Stranger: There is common expression here.

Stranger: They say Florida is America's anus.

You: I don't love it, so I won't disagree. But Austria doesn't really get mentioned a lot here.

Stranger: There is not much to talk about here

You: Does that say something about your country?

Stranger: It must

Stranger: Nothing happens here, all quiet.

You: That's boring.

Stranger: Is this a bad thing

Stranger: Florida has many many hearings, and homosexuals on news here

You: I'm sad that you guys have nothing better to watch on tv than gay people from florida.

Stranger: There is much to do for fun.

Stranger: We take tour in prison

Stranger: Or play in ocean

Stranger: Or tip cow.

You: What's your capital again?

Stranger: Vienna

You: I hear that's pretty.

Stranger: Yes its very good

Stranger: Lots of cafe

Stranger: Good place for friends and Monkeys

You: I don't drink Coffee.

Stranger: What do you drink?

You: So it's not a good place for me.

You: Water, milk, juice, lemonade, but mostly water.

Stranger: We have lots of drin

Stranger: k

You: I don't drink alcohol either.

Stranger: Have ytou ever drink cow blood before, it very salty

And that is where I dropped that conversation. 

Thank you Omegle. Yes, I did make up a fake name. Yes, I realize this is probably a joke, but people are idiots. Here's the proof.